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Smile for the day

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Fri Aug 15, 2014 8:25 pm

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John 3:16
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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Fri Aug 15, 2014 8:49 pm

: These people will be voting in a few years!!




Why Teachers DRINK



The following questions were set in last year's GED examination



These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)



Q. Name the four seasons

A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar



Q. How is dew formed

A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire



Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on

A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowe




Q. What are steroids

A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs

(Shoot yourself now, there is little hope)



Q. What happens to your body as you age

A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental



Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty

A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery (So true)



Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes

A. Premature death




Q. How can you delay milk turning sour

A. Keep it in the cow

(Simple, but brilliant)



Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)

A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U (wtf!)



Q. What is the fibula?

A. A small lie



Q. What does 'varicose' mean?

A. Near by



Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'

A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome



Q. What is a seizure?

A. A Roman Emperor.

(Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)



Q. What is a terminal illness

A. When you are sick at the airport.

(Irrefutable)



Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?

A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight

(brilliant)



Q. What is a turbine?

A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head. Once a Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.

(now weâre getting somewhere)
John 3:16
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Re: Smile for the day

Postby bobodu » Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:08 am

Teaching Math in 1950:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price.
What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1960:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80.
What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1970:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger exchanges a set, "L", of lumber for a set, "M", of money.
The cardinality of set "M" is 100. Each element is worth one dollar.
Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set "M."
The set "C", the cost of production contains 20 fewer points than set "M"
Represent the set "C" as a subset of set "M" and answer the following question: What is the cardinality of the set "P" of profits?

Teaching Math in 1980:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20.
Your assignment is to - Write and underline the number "20".

Teaching Math in 1990:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By cutting down beautiful trees and desecrating the precious forest a logger makes $20.
What do you think of this way of making a living?
Topic for class participation after answering the question:
How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the trees? - There are no wrong answers.

Teaching Math in 2000:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $120.
How does an IRS Agent determine that his profit margin is $275?

Teaching Math in 2014
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"El hachero vende un camion cargapor 100,000 pesos.
La cuestade production es... "
"Give me a fast ship, for I intend to go into harm's way."
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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:31 am

bobodu wrote:Teaching Math in 1950:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price.
What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1960:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80.
What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1970:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger exchanges a set, "L", of lumber for a set, "M", of money.
The cardinality of set "M" is 100. Each element is worth one dollar.
Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set "M."
The set "C", the cost of production contains 20 fewer points than set "M"
Represent the set "C" as a subset of set "M" and answer the following question: What is the cardinality of the set "P" of profits?

Teaching Math in 1980:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20.
Your assignment is to - Write and underline the number "20".

Teaching Math in 1990:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By cutting down beautiful trees and desecrating the precious forest a logger makes $20.
What do you think of this way of making a living?
Topic for class participation after answering the question:
How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the trees? - There are no wrong answers.

Teaching Math in 2000:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $120.
How does an IRS Agent determine that his profit margin is $275?

Teaching Math in 2014
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"El hachero vende un camion cargapor 100,000 pesos.
La cuestade production es... "




SI SI sig-nor :D :D

Travis :usa:
John 3:16
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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:42 pm

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Sat Aug 16, 2014 10:36 pm

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Sun Aug 17, 2014 2:16 pm

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Mon Aug 18, 2014 4:47 am

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Mon Aug 18, 2014 7:12 pm

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Re: Smile for the day

Postby okie » Tue Aug 19, 2014 11:48 am

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